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Stick
06-16-2002, 11:38 AM
This story belongs to my family and only my family knows it all so brothers and sisters sit on down at the kitchen table.
My wife and I have been married to each other three times. I can honestly say that Vietnam and its residuals have caused 2 divorces but I'll die before I'll pay for another one and Vietnam will never take precedence over family.
If a DNA test were taken of my kids, you would find that I am the biological father of 3 of the 7. The other 4 came along while Joanne and I were divorced.
On our last First Anniversary (sounds weird, but really does make sense) Jo and I stood in front of a Judge and asked my non-biological kids whom they wanted as their Dad. Each of them pointed to me, each of them chose me, and the court allowed me to adopt them and be their father.
While divorced the last time I did whole bunches of boozing and toking. I ignored my obligations to my kids or even the fact that I had kids. How terrible a father can be to his kids? I will never be the same.
The day that Jo and I were married last was the day after I smoked my last joint and several days after my last binge.
Today I have the honor of having seven children and eleven grandchildren. My kids call me DAD and my grandchildren call me Grand-pa. Beats any other honor that can be given to a man.

judyvillecco
07-14-2002, 11:51 AM
God bless you for hanging in there and not giving up and her and them for putting up with you.:D Really i know what a pain it can be and add the medicators to it..it only makes it worse but God bless you for turning it around. We do a lot of stupid things before we know what else to do. Congrats Dad.

Sgt_Tropo
07-17-2002, 11:46 AM
I know exactly whereof you speak. I, too, am the proud Dad of 3 kids who are not my biological own.
I met my wife after two failed marriages after my return from Vietnam. She had three daughters, whom I thought were the most beautiful girls in the world. After dating for several months, I knew that this woman was indeed the one God had chosen for me. However, I also knew that if the kids were not supportive of our marriage, it would never work.
I took the initiative and asked each of the girls, individually, how they felt about me marrying their mom. The girls were 11, 10 and 8 years of age and they each told me that they wanted me to be their new dad. Now the two youngest girls had never known their "real" father, because their parents had divorced when the youngest was a just a baby and he simply disappeared from their life.
When I asked my wife to mary me, I also told her that I wanted to adopt the girls as my own. I wanted us to all have the same name and to be truly a family. She agreed to both of my requests and we just celebrated our 26th anniversary.
I've made a lot of mistakes in my life, both personally and as a Dad, but the two things I'll never regret are marrying my wife and adopting my girls.
My wife and I now have three grandkids and each and every Father's Day I get the best present of all; I get cards and kisses from my girls and I get to hear them say, "Happy Father's Day, Daddy".
I'm glad you found out what is really important in life, LittleJohn and I wish you many more years to enjoy it !

Welcome home, brother !!

reeb
07-18-2002, 04:40 PM
This is one subject that SHOULD have been brougth up a long long long time ago.

I am glad that someone finially brought it up. (no names LittleJohn)

I too am a "Bad Dad" towards my own two sons, but not to my "so called step children".

My main interest in life was to support my kids and wife the best that I could and I did, "until" my x wife and still married to me decided to get a job her in Tx.

She ran into a man at work and about three weeks later she left me for him, cause he wasnt a drinker. (cant blame her)

Me and her were divorced in Ohio in 1978 and we both came down to Tx in 79 and lived together as man and wife for quite awhile.

Tx along with alot of other states do reconize the Common Law Marriage. ( Tx family code 411)

But to get back to the main point, I actually didnt claim my kids anymore and now 20 yrs later it shows.

My oldest born 7/4/76 (bicential baby) is now married. Never met his wife, wasnt invited to the wedding, NADA NADA.

My youngest is now 23 and dont claim me cause I wouldnt bail his ass out of jail for beating up on his old lady.

Only one Grandchild out of both, and I havent met or seen the boy yet, and most likely wont.

Sure it bothers me, but what goes around come around, Right?????????????

I still love my boys, but in my own heart I have more love for the Grandchildren that I have from the common law marriage than I could for my own, I only have two , BUT they both call me GrandPa all the time,

I hope the post that started this thing keeps on going an going, Both men and women,

NOONE IS PERFECT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

One last thing:

Thank god and love that someone finially found there right mate. Somewhere in the bible it says that when you go to heaven you will meet your perfect mate.

I think I have found mine and hope the rest of you have to.

enough............

sfc_darrel
07-18-2002, 07:12 PM
This could get bloody with all the deep wounds being opened.

:ai:

When Darrel & I got married, I asked Chris & Peter, individually, if they wanted to participate in the wedding. Each responded with "I want to give you to Darrel". Their love for him confuses him some days because he's not perfect.

I tried to tell him that's OK because if he was perfect then it is attainable and I have to be perfect too. Besides that, the only perfect person was crucified so it is probably not a good idea anyway (with apologies to those who are offended).

As one of those who found the right person, I sometimes feel sorry for those who aren't us.

:q:
Joy

Edit: Deep open wounds here were just reopened by family. Can't share that part right now.

Boats
10-02-2002, 02:45 PM
Sp4LittleJohn,

My Mom was married 4 times and my Dad married 5 times.
But!!!! I've been married to one woman (God Bless her)
for 36 years now and its not been a cake walk but she's
more than I can handle.

Fly The Flag

Boats