PTSD Evaluation tommorrow

[PHO127]

After 4 years, I go to a shrink tommorrow at 11:15 am to be evaluated for dissability for PTSD. I sat down last night and read a VA pamphlet on PTSD symptoms, according to it, my first wife, my second wife, my third wife, my two sons, DMZ-LT and the last guy I tried to choke to death I suffer from PTSD. Funny that I don't feel bad.

[DMZ-LT]

You may not feel bad but you don't look to good to me ! You will do fine - no shortage of behavioral examples . Start off with the shootout at the Mexican resturant and then the telephone you just had to shoot off the wall. The riot you started at the legion was grins too. Don't choke the shrink !. I am more afraid they will keep you and then Moustache, Ron and I will have to come get you loose. Thanks for the friendship bro. PS can I have the Harley hard tail if they do keep you ? :a:

[SEATJERKER]

...when I first saw your post, cause it sliped me back a bit, and I needed more time to respond "properly"...

...I'll say "It's a good thing to do, as you have to do it for you"...

...It will outline many specific points that you be able to put 2, and 2 together, and get 4... meaning answers lie within yourself, and it will help you understand what your "stressors" were/are, and how to deal with them now in a different enviorments...

... every one of us that has PTSD understand that it is not universial across the board in any singular context...

...WE WILL BE HERE FOR YOU, is what I want you to know, and make a little mental note now that the evaluation will not change who you are, it will help you to understand where you've been, and help guide you to where you need to be within yourself...

...I call it the "pressure release valve" like on your grandmothers pressure cooker....... it sits there, and goes tststststs, as it boils, and allows you to get "things" off your chest, and vent "slowly" in order to communicate with your counsler under a "controlled" soft , at your own pace timeline...

...It will take time for you to "let things out" that you have built up over time, and pm me if you would, and I'll give you my home number...

... if there comes a time where you just need to talk to a real voice, doesn't matter, day or night, I'm usually up anyway CALL...

...A lot of people here "walked through" my time with me, and we're here to walk with you now...

...We understand, and Welcome Home...

...Curtis...

[Arrow]

Sid PTSD is not all bad. It can sometimes work for you. For instance it means you most likely will not get killed in your bed. That's because you don't sleep much and when you do you can still hear an ant scurry across the kitchen counter downstairs and at the back of the house. (unless your on drugs) I don't let them give me drugs. It makes you lose your edge. I like the edge I have. I want to know at all times what kinda of critters are comin' around esp the two legged kind with evil on their mind. ;)

[xgrunt]

If this is a C&P if the Doctor is not knowledgeable about the facts in your files then if the eval is not to your liking you can request another one and they HAVE to give to you. My first question would be Are you current on my claims and medical info. If he says no, continue on but be ready to use that option. Do you need any kind of mixs for the Vodka your bring down. I can get them. Also going to have some P-Vet MC T-shirts printed that on the front will have Torch's Housewarming and some flamework. Take care and good luck tomorrow. Frank :xx:

[blues clues]

Most of these doctors don't know what PTSD is hell i've got it and I'm still not sure the wife knows,sparrow is right don't have to worry about dieing in bed, the only thing I can tell you is just be yourself it'll scar the living hell out of them,like the others said good luck tomorrow.
razz

[phuloi]

C&P evals can be a bit overwhelming for some..at least they were for me.The best advice I can offer is to be honest-Brutally honest.Good luck Brother,and God Speed.Oh..and bring a Bro along if at all possible.

[Andy]

I know you?re probably aware of this but they are looking for cause and effect. Never had any problems psychologically till a little while after Dad died. (In Vietnam I used to always pray that I?d live to be 42, at 19, 42 is a pretty old dude. At age 42 my Dad died - just another person who took the hit when it should have been me.) That was when the John Wayne facade started to wear thin.

You were in some deep serious situations let them know, be graphic, just be honest.
Today, even with medications I?m anxious, have anxiety, sharp noises freak me out, sometimes large crowds are too much, depression can be a bummer and they told me I was homicidal / suicidal and I?m supposed to have survivor?s guilt. HOWEVER, other than that, I?m fine. They gave me 30% and never asked me to come back for a re-evaluation. But every damn time I visit the shirk he suggests that I do the 6 week in-house program.

Unlike some, I have a hard time getting to sleep but once sleeping there could be a rocket attack and I?d never wake up. Sleep like a lion not a deer.

Maybe this is too much information, maybe too personal but knowing how another ?victim? is dealing with things could be of some help. Hope it is.

Stay healthy,
Andy
PS: I told the shrink exactly what an APC looks like with a couple of people in it after an RPG-7 hits. About 10 minutes into the description he told me to stop. Seemed that got his attention and he appeared to look a little ill.

[Arrow]

Sid believe me even though I joke about some of the triggers I have PTSD is a heck of a ride. Some people do not believe it exists I guess they forget about shell shock and soldiers heart. Soldiers heart best describes to me PTSD. One thing though I really believe is that we have to keep movin'. It was just the easier thing for me to close the doors and live in my bunker. Only moving around at night to go to the grocery store. And sometimes would not even bother to do that. I would get hungry but would blow it off til the feelin' passed. I was not drinkin' or doing drugs. I just lost my will to live. I had suffered with symptoms for years but kept it pretty well hid...my deepest despair came after I lost a job and lost contact with someone I really cared about a year ago in the spring..that is when PTSD startin' kickin my ass big time..

But one day after all the prayers and good thoughts and wishes extended to me LT said Keep Movin' and pm me the story of what happened to him in Nam. About the same time my son reminded me of how I always encouraged them to get up and pick up their ruck no matter what when they were young. Something just lifted and I knew I was going to be able to go back to work..

If someone is physically unable to work..or emotionally unable to cope with a work environment...then I would encourage them to write a book..paint a picture..make white oak baskets..work on someone's Harley..be the best Dad or Mom or friend or lover in the whole world....just have a goal and work at it everyday. Just keep movin' and don't let anyone turn you around or sit you down..if you quit it's a death sentence for sure. Our bodies absorb every bit of stress our minds manufacture when we are standin' still with time on our hands..it will kill us..it's a simple thing to say to yourself but a hard thing to do but it is savin' my life a day at a time. Keep movin' brothers and sisters you are loved..sis..

[PHO127]

Spent last night thinking about things, shed some tears had some smiles. Still regret not killin the Major. Talk to ya later.

[DMZ-LT]

You'll be fine bro, like most have said - just tell the truth. I got a crew together in case they try to keep you. See you at the rally point tomorrow on the mountain, with black powder rifles, lookin for Mr. Pig. You have helped me keep movin many times - now it's my turn to put down some covering fire while you move out. So what you waiting for troop ? Scouts out !!

[SEATJERKER]

... it's like starting to turn your key in the door of life again...

...hope these words of encouragement reach you before you go today... It's like Griz said, "be honest" as the truth's that you all have faced are stronger then any lies that can be conjured up by a bullshitter...
...we as thousands of others know that PTSD is real, and each individual person has individual situations that are forever embeded in of minds...It's how you have to deal with them after you know the signals of oncoming aggression that takes you to a place that you don't want to be again...
...on wanting to kill the major, glad you didn't, don't know why you mentioned it, but wanting to kill is easier then stopping yourself from doing it, somewhere in the grey matter is that "split second of reaction" that we're all accustomed to, and the ability to control, takes that extra "split second of control" to supress it...
...most of all, take the time now to know that you are an honorable person, no matter what you were called upon to do in the name of freedom, you are a man of distinction cut from a very special cloth of the soldier, and the weave only accepts a very special few...
,,,Welcome Home, and be well for yourself...

[1CAVCCO15MED]

.I've been camping next to a river full of trout and they are biting. PTSD is great for fishing. Not one single nudge gets by my notice.LOL Seriously, I wouldn't sleep hardly at all if I didn't run a fan year round to drown out the night noises. I will say once again, the inpatient PTSD program at Salem, Va. VA is world class excellent. I am going back for a tuneup after the first of the year. You can even almost eat the food. Andy, if you ever get the hankering to go, that is the place.

[PHO127]

Sorry LT, I still keep the Harley. Had a nice long talk, She was amazed that I had not spent time in prison. Records are still f****ked up though. Her copy of my dd214 was missing 6 years of service. It shows I entered the Army in 1972, not 1966. It shows VN Awards but I had already done final tour in 1971. She read the letter from General Johnston and granted me that It would be hard to challenge the word of a 3 star general. Doc, she asked me what I wanted out of this and I told her that I didn't want to hurt anybody and that you had told me of a program in Salem, VA. to go to. She said it was one of the best. All in all it was a good day. I am now headed to the mountains to meet up with LT and Ron and we are going to go black powder hunting for wild hogs. SSHHH be vewry vewry quiet

[1CAVCCO15MED]

All she has to do is contact them. They will get you up for a three day evaluation. It is mostly just a complete physical so they can see if you would be able physically to handle the stay. One of the people up there is TR, a former Green Beret. He's got some good Martha Raye stories. He was somewhere near us during 68-69. I would say you two have met somewhere along the line. That place did me a lot of good.