The Patriot Files Forums - When You Are Over Seventy (70+)

When You Are Over Seventy (70+)

1. I was standing at the bar one night minding my own business. This FAT, ugly chick
came up behind me, grabbed my behind and said, “You’re kind’a cute. You gotta phone
number?”

I said, “Yeah, you gotta pen?”
She said, “Yeah, I got a pen”.
I said, “You better get back in it before the farmer misses you.”

It cost me 6 stitches, but, when you’re over seventy……………who cares?

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2. Cowboy: “Give me 3 packets of condoms, please.”
Lady Cashier: “Do you need a paper bag with that, sir?”
Cowboy: “Nah… She’s purty good lookin’…..”

Note when you’re over seventy……………who cares?

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3. I was talking to a young woman in the bar last night.
She said, “If you lost a few pounds, had a shave and got your hair cut, you’d look all
right.”
I said, “If I did that, I’d be talking to your friends over there instead of you.”

It cost me a fat lip, but when you’re over seventy……………who cares?

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4. I got caught taking a pee in the swimming pool today. The lifeguard shouted at me so
loud, I nearly fell in.

Cost me a bloody nose, but when you’re over seventy……………who cares?

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5. I went to the pub last night and saw a BIG woman dancing on a table.
I said, “Good legs.”
The girl giggled and said, “Do you really think so?”
I said, “Definitely! Most tables would have collapsed by now.”

Cost me 6 more stitches, but when you’re over seventy……………who cares?