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-   -   PC the New Language. (http://www.patriotfiles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=42294)

Keith_Hixson 05-24-2006 05:11 PM

PC the New Language.
 
For all you southern red necks. You must change your language. Become PC. :D

Keith :D

1. She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" - She is a "NICELY FIGURED
AMERICAN WOMAN."

2. She is not a "SCREAMER" or a "MOANER" - She is "VOCALLY
APPRECIATIVE."

3. She is not "EASY" - She is "HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE."

4. She is not a "DUMB BLONDE" - She is a "LIGHT-HAIRED
DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY."

5. She has not "BEEN AROUND" - She is a "PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANIONS."

6. She is not an "AIRHEAD" - She is "REALITY IMPAIRED."

7. They don't get "DRUNK" or "TIPSY" - They are "CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED"

8. She does not have "BREAST IMPLANTS" - She is "MEDICALLY
ENHANCED."

9. She does not "NAG" you - She becomes "VERBALLY
REPETITIVE."

10. She is not a "TRAMP" - She is a "SEXUAL EXTROVERT."

11. She does not have "LARGE BOOBS" - She is
"PECTORALLY SUPERIOR."

12. She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" - She is a "LOW COST
PROVIDER."

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a
"LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY."

2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is "RHYTHMICALLY DYSFUNCTIONAL."

3. He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" - He "INVESTIGATES
ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS."

4. He is not "BALDING" - He is in "FOLLICLE REGRESSION."

5. He is not a "CRADLE ROBBER" - He prefers "GENERATIONAL
DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS."

6. He does not get "FALLING-DOWN DRUNK" - He becomes
"ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL."

7. He does not act like a "TOTAL ASS" - He develops a case
of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION."

8. He is not a "MALE CHAUVINIST PIG" - He has "SWINE
EMPATHY."

9. He is not afraid of "COMMITMENT" - He is "RELATIONSHIP
CHALLENGED."

10. He is not "HORNY" - He is "SEXUALLY FOCUSED."

11. It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his pants
It's "REAR CLEAVAGE

b3196 05-24-2006 05:24 PM

Thanks Keith...I feel a whole lot better about myself.....I will be using the "Sexually Focused" term regularly, hopefully with some Horizontally Accessible, Medically Enhanced, Sexual Extrovert, or Low Cost Provider
Bob K

Jerry D 05-25-2006 05:50 PM

those are some funny PC names to rename old standards :D

Keith_Hixson 05-26-2006 08:01 AM

Brother Bob,
 
As usual, what do they feed you in Indianapolis? :D You need help I'm here for you, your therapist.

Actually I posted this for Sid, LT John, Curtis, and Gracie.

Keith :D

b3196 05-26-2006 04:15 PM

Keith
We eat a new breakfast cereal called "Prostituties" When you're finished eating the bowl you eat the......I cant say that, Can I ?
Bob K

PHO127 05-26-2006 04:52 PM

I tried to
 
get on the internet and order a perfect pc from dell. They sent me a confirmation with a note that they had not been able to disable the verbal repetative key and did I still want the order. I replied that I was hearing disabled, visually challenged, rhythmiically challenged and agedly decrepit anyway and please send her right away. Dell reply "it appears that your software and our hardware are not functionally compatable"

revwardoc 05-28-2006 02:36 PM

Bob K,

I remember a cereal called "Prostituties"; unlike Rice Crispies, when you pour on the milk, they don't "Snap, Crackle, & Pop"; they "Bang"!

b3196 05-28-2006 04:47 PM

Doc
Thats the same thing we eat here!!!! What a small world
Bob K


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