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#1
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Top 25 great drinking quotes
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I'd rather be historically accurate than politically correct. |
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#2
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As quoted by the infamous conniseur of fine liquor. John (DMZ-LT) on 11/10/07
I can tell the difference between Crown Royal and that Rock Gut bourbon.
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Bob K. AKA bOOger God bless the ACLU Last edited by b3196; 11-28-2007 at 04:40 AM. |
#3
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Pay back is a MFer
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#4
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How about
Put the plug in the jug and get your life together so you can become a human being again. Worked for me real well.
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If your going to suceed your going to have to know how to deal with failure. (Joe Torre). |
#5
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Why do I feel that my appearance on the mountain in April will be a MF'er
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Bob K. AKA bOOger God bless the ACLU |
#6
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Clyde's in Court
A farmer named Clyde had a car accident.
In court, the trucking company's fancy hot shot lawyer, was questioning Clyde. "Didn't you say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine,'?" asked the lawyer. Clyde responded, "Well, I'll tell you what happened. I had just loaded my favourite cow, Bessie, into the..." "I didn't ask for any details", the lawyer interrupted. "Just answer the question, please. Did you, or did you not say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine!'?" Clyde said, "Well, I had just got Bessie into the trailer and I was driving down the road...." The lawyer interrupted again and said, "Your Honor, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the Highway Patrolman on the scene that he was just fine. Now several weeks after the accident he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please tell him to simply answer the question." By this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Clyde 's answer and said to the lawyer, "I'd like to hear what he has to say about his favourite cow, Bessie". Clyde thanked the Judge and proceeded. "Well, as I was saying, I had just loaded Bessie, my favourite cow, into the trailer and was driving her down the highway when this huge semi-truck and trailer ran the stop sign and smacked my truck right in the side. I was thrown into one ditch and Bessie was thrown into the other. I was hurting, real bad and didn't want to move. However, I could hear old Bessie moaning and groaning. I knew she was in terrible shape just by her groans. Shortly after the accident a Highway Patrolman came on the scene. He could hear Bessie moaning and groaning, so he went over to her. After he looked at her, and saw her fatal condition, he took out his gun and shot her between the eyes. Then the Patrolman came across the road, gun still in hand, looked at me, and said, "How are you feeling?" "Now tell me, what the f@#k would you say?"
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Boats O Almighty Lord God, who neither slumberest nor sleepest; Protect and assist, we beseech thee, all those who at home or abroad, by land, by sea, or in the air, are serving this country, that they, being armed with thy defence, may be preserved evermore in all perils; and being filled with wisdom and girded with strength, may do their duty to thy honour and glory; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. "IN GOD WE TRUST" |
#7
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My favorite US Grant quote
" What is 3 gallons of whiskey among one man?"
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When you can't think what to do, throw a grenade |
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