Now, for the rest of the story:

[1CAVCCO15MED]

This being retired is harder than I thought. You working stiffs think YOU have problems: I get up to Minnesota and apply for my seven day fishing license. The clerk puts my name and driver's license number into the computer then gets this funny look. "Were you here about ten years ago?" "Yes, I came up with the scouts on another canoe trip." "Well, I can't give you a fishing license." "Why?" " According to the computer, you are a canoe." "I got a question." "Yes?" "How does a canoe get a driver's license?" "Hey, I'm just a clerk. You need to call Monday to the main office to clear this up." On Monday I would be 35 miles into the wilderness. There was another way, using the Social Security Number and my real first name, William. I was called the USS Fred the rest of the trip.

Flash forward to this afternoon. Shirley and I are scouting out places to impress the Yankees and Flatlanders (Andy and Paco) when they come to God's country. How about Elk River Falls? It is about four stories tall and very beautiful. The problem was deciding if two gimpy legged old vets can make it down the stairs. (I think so.) Anyway, we are lying on a rock at the base of the falls, me in my yellow hat. We're sittin' there watching some idiots jump off the top of the falls, planning fracture stabilization, CPR and notifying EMS when something landed on my hat. I take it off to see what it is and find a rabid bat knawing on my finger. Did I mention it was one in the afternoon? He falls on the rock and sits there grinning at me like, "Hee hee, I'm taking you with me, boy." (Even the bats are hillbillies here. Nice little bitty coonskin cap though) To make a long story short, I go to the ER and get 7 (seven) shots. Rabies immunoglobulin to the pinkie. "I confess!" "To what?" "Anything you want me to!" Four shots of 5cc immunoglobulin, two to each hip. Rabies shot to left shoulder, tetanus shot to right shoulder.

And then, AND THEN, Shirley gets Patriot of the month. Take hat off (thanks, Andy), no turning my back on her in her presence. The part about not sitting in her presence is easy, my butt is too sore anyway.

The shots are 100% effective but just in case, I'm taking bids on who needs biting. It's $1000 a bite plus expenses. (I fly first class.)