Have you gone?

[inhonurofswa]

Its these small town hicks that are pushing me more and more towards joining the forces I'll tel you, no one cares at my school and it is bugging the heck outta me. But a more important question is, have any of you guys been over to Viet Nam after you served? I want to so bad, that's what I'm planning to do after college, after I get settled down into some where, I'm going and I was just wondering if any of you have already been, not including the war.

I was talking about closure earlier and how to come about it or I guess how it comes about you, but in my heart I truly believe that to give myself closure, not that I'm forgetting just closure, that's where I need to end, or begin, I've written a book, a pretty long one, and it helped, I soreted the thoughts that I needed sorted but typing a book doesn't give you answers, the print can't tell you things any different than your mind already knew, it made me see things more clearly but that is just the begining. So, back to my question, have you gone? Did it help? Was it hard(emotionally)? Were they friendly? Could you go anywhere you wanted, or just to the big cities, did you want to go anywhere else? Can you still see the war on their land in their faces? Please help me out. Thank you so much!

Taylor

[Robert Ryan]

Taylor, no I haven't gone back. I don't think I need to, and certainly don't want to go back.

[exlrrp]

Originally posted by inhonurofswa Its these small town hicks that are pushing me more and more towards joining the forces I'll tel you, no one cares at my school and it is bugging the heck outta me. But a more important question is, have any of you guys been over to Viet Nam after you served? I want to so bad, that's what I'm planning to do after college, after I get settled down into some where, I'm going and I was just wondering if any of you have already been, not including the war.

I was talking about closure earlier and how to come about it or I guess how it comes about you, but in my heart I truly believe that to give myself closure, not that I'm forgetting just closure, that's where I need to end, or begin, I've written a book, a pretty long one, and it helped, I soreted the thoughts that I needed sorted but typing a book doesn't give you answers, the print can't tell you things any different than your mind already knew, it made me see things more clearly but that is just the begining. So, back to my question, have you gone? Did it help? Was it hard(emotionally)? Were they friendly? Could you go anywhere you wanted, or just to the big cities, did you want to go anywhere else? Can you still see the war on their land in their faces? Please help me out. Thank you so much!

Taylor

Taylor
my friend Tom (friscokid) and I went back in 2003. Tom went again last year. You can see the pictures of this in the Gallery here and check our comments historically.
Its hard to say why I went, there were a lot of reasons. I guess I can sum it up as "unfinshed business." Now its finished. I guss that might be "closure."
Vietnam was the most formative year of my life, the most exciting, the most terrifying, the most challenging--then it all went away. there was a great Doonesbury cartoon the other day where their in the PTSD group--one guy talks about the awesomeness of what we saw and what we did--then says he's been cleaning pools since then. I thought that was SO insightful. Life has sure been anticlimactical since then for me also, though it has been exciting. I passed my 19th birthday walking point in the Ia Drang Valley, our continuous mission was scoping out the Ho Chi Minh Trail. How are you going to top THAT for excitement back in "The World?"
I was amazingly ignorant of the situation both while there and after, its only through a lifetime of study that Ive been able to fully understand what I was involved in. There was the political war--and then there was my war.
There was always a big hole there afterwards, it was part of the healing. Only decades later can I look at it all and try and be objective.

To answer your questions:

have you gone? --Yes I went back. I woke up one morning.and said: I'm going back--within a few months I was there. I'm going back again to make the Hanoi to Saigon run, see al the places I didn't see yet.

Did it help? It helped a lot, made things alot easier in my mind. The people were living the best I had ever seen them , certainly better than at any time when Americans were running the show. The Big difference is modernization--when we were there in the 60s, the Vietnamese were still using oxcarts and bicycles for transportation--now EVERYBODY'S got at least a motorscooter, the whole country's mobile, Cell phones are all over, so are faxes, video stores and internet cafes even the small villages have them. Every building had electricty, even the small huts and TV antennas popped up all over. You could see some satellite discs for TV too.
it reallyhelped me a lot to see the Vietnamese living so well compared to when we were there--there were millions of refugees, people living in the streets.
We didn't see one beggar (compare to US cities!) nor whorehouse, nor any srteet urchins peddling their sisters as in the days of the US control. That made me feel better, made me feel like their leaders knew what they were doing. I don't agree with their politics but there's no hungry begging kids. They're doing something right--something we weren't doing.
When I left Vietnam in 1968 I could see then that what that country needed was a long time of peace to heal. SO I started protesting the war when I got out of the Army because I thought it REALLY sucked, that it was a useless waste of life and that Vietnam would be better without the US in it. Going back again proved me exactly right about that---its a far better place now than at any time when we were incharge of it. Ending the war ASAP WAS the right thing to do, for Vietnam AND the US. That is the most important thing I learned going back. It made me glad I protested it, made it easier to look the Vietnamese in the eyes.
I only wish them well and they seem to be doing well---maybe thats why I had a good time.

Were they friendly? Could you go anywhere you wanted, or just to the big cities, did you want to go anywhere else?
they were very friiendly and curious. The Vietnamese teach English to their kids as a 2d language, not French any more or Chinese or Russian. That shows you who they want their kids talking to. We ran across many people who just wanted to come up and talk--were they "enemy agents" trying to pump us for info? Well any enemy agent that thinks he can get useful military infomation out of me an my old lady is DEFINTELY pissing up the wrong flagpole. I mean I got old yarns and unlikely stories but important military info is somethig I NEVER had. The military never told me much worth knowing, thats for sure, and I been trying to forget what they did tell me since (especially attitudes towards women)
We could go anywhere, there was no restrictions at all that I saw. We hired a van and driver AND interpreter--$50/day included gas, tolls, meals and lodging for the driver and interpreter. We talked to anyone we pleased. Theyre really trying to develop a tourist industry and are really succeeding--they WANT americans there and will cater to them. and if anyone gives you a hard time, just threaten to report them to the People's Committee on Sucking Up To Tourists and I mean chop chop little comrade.
One of the things I learned that was a surprise to me is how beautiful the country is--over a thousand miles of coast line with many beautifyul beaches. In a whole year in the Nam, I got to the beach once--marched in a platoon.

Was it hard(emotionally)
Not as hard emotionally as being there the first time, not even in the same universe. It was very cathartic for me, sometimes felt the tears overwhelming me. An example is when we were leaving Ban Me Thuout and both me and Tom were lookiimg for the old helicopter base that had been there--we'd both spent time there during the war. We used to stage patrols into indian country from there,I was mortared rfor 2 days there during the tet offensive. When we got to it, there was no trace left of the base--and what was there was---wait for it-- a waterslide park. well, I started crying couldn't really say why. Its been one stange fucking life--one day youre walking point on a lrrp patrol down the HO Chi Minh Trail and one day youre standing in front of a waterslide park, crying. I NEVER cried the first time I was there. This was some of the unfinished business. I realized that I may just be becoming human again.
Something else I came to reaize was how racist we were to the Vietnamese--nevr saw them as really human. We called them gooks, dinks. slopes, whatever came into our minds. We thought of them as not as good as us, dumb little gooks to be ordered around at the point of a gun. we ran our war right over the top of them without ANY thoughts to their needs or feelings, they were pawns to be pushed out of the way. It was the corporate culture.
Americans don't like to be called racists but we're a very racist country and have been for all our existence. 400 years of slavery and 100 years of racial segregation afterwards proved that. And I was part of it, still am.
What was most striking to me was that now the "gooks" looked just like people you'd see in the mall or down the street. No more black PJs or cone hats, its tshirts, jeans and joggging shoes. Its a lot harder to kill people who look like people you'd see at home and shove them around, although it can be done.
to that end, I'm going to show you one of the most cathartic pictures of my trip there. Just a simple advertisement but look at what it shows--a happy Vietnamese family, clean, obviously enjoying life provided with the better things of life. the kids in that picture have a future--the future looked REALY bad for the kids when I was in Vietnam the first time. Its a picture of prosperity, with people affluent enough to afford choices. yeah its just an image but it was a war of images. It comes across to me that this was what I was fighting for. It still chokes me up when I look at it.
Its there now. And it happened after we quit fighting. We won when we packed up and left Vietnam to the Vietnamese--and so did the Vietnamese

Can you still see the war on their land in their faces?
You can't hardly see traces of the war there, other than what they wanted to keep. 500lb bomb raters make great fish ponds, for instance,there's circular fishponds all over. We couldn't hardly find a trace of the war other than that, no old bunkers, no barb wire, no old military trucks even, no military running around, even the cops are unarmed.
As I say, plenty of them speak English, and they want to try it out. I really enjoyed especially talking to the university kids in Qui Nhon when we were there. Waliing around in the towns, little kids would come up to us waving and sayiong Helllo Hello. This didn't happen in the 60s, they would have been begging

most of the country was born since the war so you don't see much resentment and most of that from old people.. Tommy said he got hard looks but he was wearing hats with US military insignia on it including the old South Vietnamese yelllow and green. Compare this to dressing up as Billy Sherman and touring Atlanta--you'll get away with it but you'll sure get some looks. I was just wearing my psycovets hat with a Vietnamese army pin on it--I don't try to get along as a paratrooper in the world any more, its easier being an old wacked out hippie. They got better music and its easier to get laid. Peace! Love ! Groovy! (flashes peace sign)

Hope this was educational for you.
Stay good
James

[Robert Ryan]

NO there will never be another natural high or rush like that again. I surely haven't felt it since.

[Boats]

NO I wouldn't go back either. It's often an asked question. Many have gone and found whatever they are looking for. Me hell I'd rather stay here - over there is there - and I'd rather be here.

[exlrrp]

I didn't like how it ended so I went back and made it into a happier ending. Now i feel much better about it all.
Thats me--going out and having fun all over the world--so you don't have to!

Stay good
james

Picture is self in Pleiku--2003. Notice how clean the streets are? When I was here in '67-68 this was a dirt road with barbwire and bunkers all along it.

[exlrrp]

Originally posted by exlrrp I didn't like how it ended so I went back and made it into a happier ending. Now i feel much better about it all.
Thats me--going out and having fun all over the world--so you don't have to!

Stay good
james

Picture is self in Pleiku--2003. Notice how clean the streets are? When I was here in '67-68 this was a dirt road with barbwire and bunkers all along it.

What a difference 35 years makes.
this is what I loooked like near Pleiku, 68

[Boats]

You haven't aged a bit. Glad you made it home and thanks again for your service.

[Robert Ryan]

Exlrpp the streets looked the same from March 1969 until the 4th moved to An Khe. But your right the streets sure look clean and not war like.

[Packo]

I have always been so proud of James and Frisco for going back. I think it took guts. The only reason I'd go back is to get my original hip back. Hear someone's using it as an ashtray. Since I can't get it back, I have no desire to go there. Everyone I've ever talked to that went called it a healing experience. It probably is but one I will never know. I think. I just don't think I could do it.

Pack