Dreams

[Tina]

Lastnite, I got up out of bed and dressed.. I heard my dad having one of his dreams about nam.. I grabbed a cold wash cloth.. and went to his room.. when i got there mom got up (its hard for her to see dad that way) I sat there while he dreammed(learning not to wake him or we will just go thru it again in ten mins..) When he jumped and sat in bed i new it was over.. I talked to him and let him push me away till he finaly relized he was really at home and i was his daughter trying to help him.. All I do is tell him dad its okay your home and not in nam.. its okay its tina.. so on..
then mom comes back to bed and they go to sleep again.. while i am crying the hole time he is dreamming and while iam talking to him.. I go lay back down in my bed and cry some more.. that is my dad.. and then i start thinging about all you that i no still have the dreams to.. Only if i could go one mnt with out a dream.. here latly i can't go a week without at least on dream..
Its getting harder and harder.. I know i have to be the one to stay strong mom can't do it anymore it tares her up..
just needed to share with someone..
love you
Your friend and God Bless,
Tina

[phuloi]

You are honestly and truely a blessing to your daddy,and whether you realize it or not,to me and to all of us here.I feel bad that you have to be that solid rock for him to lean on, but I also know that you wouldn`t have it any other way.God has blessed you both.

I`m going to have my little Kati read your post.I know she will understand.

Tonight,we will pray for peace for your daddy and you.You`re an Angel,Keep looking up.

[DMZ-LT]

What Griz said , thank you.. you are not alone.... many here have been and are walking the same path you are on....... ask my family. You keep movin girl it will work out. Peace on your path today and always

[SparrowHawk62]

Tina, thank you. Both for your post and supporting your Dad.
Many of us suffer from reoccurring dreams that recount days we served. Most of us here understand what you have written all to well.

[Desdichado]

Noise.

Dreams (mine at least) get triggered by ambient noise. For an ex-grunt, which I'm assuming your father is, the quiet of night can trigger bad stuff, since maybe ninety percent of every bad moment was preceded by quiet.

Maybe it was a year of listening to "outgoing", and the safety that made me feel, but for myself, I like thunderous booms. Thunderstorms, railway cars crashing together, those cannon noises Ken Burns put into his civil war series. For some reason it puts me right out and I sleep like a log - a baby log even. I have a few recordings which I use regularly. Not too loud, just loud enough to be audible and not arouse kicks from Mrs.

Some folks like ocean noises, or birds, or whale songs and such. The trick is to find something that won't keep you awake, and overrides whatever brain circuits are causing the nightmares/flashbacks. Even the radio can help, although with the news these days, that's maybe not a good solution....

Worth a try anyway.

[Tina]

My dad was in the navy for 20 years.. he went into country one. and that seems to be his biggest thing to dream about.. other then getting shot at while on ship,.
love ya
Your friend and God Bless,
Tina

[frisco-kid]

Tina, what Griz said. You just keep on being you......for your Dad, and us. I know it's tough,and sometimes scary Darlin', but I know he appreciates waking up to you and your concern. Much better than waking up alone. You're an angel.

Has he ever considered, or is he now, going to the VA for some support and counseling on how to deal with these? Might be something to think about. Let him know he's not alone in this.

[Tina]

Thanks you guys you all mean so much to me..
I would never in a million years stop supporting my dad or any of you guys..
My brother took over where I left off when I moved out of mom and dads house.. When I moved back he was like I don't know how you do it all the time.. Alot of it is cause dad pushes you way for a bit before he realizes where he is..Brother hates that..I can't say I love it but I have learned to handle it.. I am the oldest child out of three..I am the only one that really knows the military life at all..So I am the one who took over for mom when she couldn't't handle it anymore.. It breaks her heart.. Takes her back to places she just soon forget for ever too..Like waiting..Evertime officers get out of a car to go to a house the feeling everyone else gets.. Its just to hard for her..So I do it I am younger and can take more and I can stay stronger forever one.. I am proud of who my dad is and what he did for me and our country and his family.. Just as I am proud of each of your for what you did for our country and your family..
The one thing I was always told as long as you are breathing there is hope.. Don't ever give up on hope.. Cause its always there.. So I am not going to start now..Still believing in hope..

Frisco- Dad does go to monthly meetings it helps him alot with lots of stuff.. Just he hates to remember just like you all.. But he does..
Thanks again you all..
love you
Your friend and God Bless,
Tina