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#1
07-22-2005, 03:24 AM
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14 Things You Really Should Have Done Before Getting Married
1. Watch yourself eating in front of a mirror. If you're put off, that's the view your future partner will have...
2. Live on your own. It's important that you find out what a hopeless slob you are before your beloved tells you. And then leaves you... 3. Go out with your friends for a "quick drink" and stagger home three days later... 4. Have a holiday romance with someone who doesn't speak a word of English. Who needs conversation? 5. Women: Take the soft toys off your bed. Nothing turns a man off more than performing in front of an audience of beady-eyed teddies... 6. Men: Get rid of those "How to Get Girls Even Though You're Poor and Ugly' books. They never work anyway... 7. Gobble the last slice of pizza without having to go through the 'No you have it, no really... Are you sure you don't mind...? 8. Walk about the house naked, without having to hold any bits in... 9. Have friends of the opposite sex. After marriage, it's too much effort to keep saying: "No, I really don't fancy them"... 10. Men: Enjoy that wardrobe space while you can! You will not believe the vast number of shoes that one woman needs... 11. Women: Fill in silly magazine quizzes with titles like 'Are You Seductive', without having to listen to loud laughter from your partner (who then runs off with the magazine)... 12. Men: Get rid of anything inflatable and female-shaped... 13. Relish clipping your toenails straight onto the carpet... 14. Remember that your best option with in-laws is to marry an orphan...
__________________
I'd rather be historically accurate than politically correct. 
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#2
07-22-2005, 04:12 AM
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When Frank became Torch he turned into a fire ball and had to decide to use his hands to cover either his face or his crotch. He choose to cover his crotch cause he figured even ugly burnt up guys got laid once in awhile. I miss him
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#3
07-22-2005, 12:47 PM
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OK
Did all of them except #11 which doesn't apply. #5, doing it in front of stuffed animals, or anyone else, no problem.
LT, I miss him too. Still mad about that rain storm that kept him from getting to Savannah. He said it was the only time he'd ever tried to travel to see a cop, without a subpoena. Stay healthy, Andy
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#6
07-28-2005, 11:28 PM
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Experts have put out a list of some foods that are known to kill a women's sex drive.
the number one food on the list is: WEDDING CAKE
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Freedom has a taste to those who fought and almost died for it...That the protected will ever know. It is the Good Lord\'s job to forgive Osama if he wishes to. It is the U.S. Military\'s job to arrange the MEETING.
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#7
07-29-2005, 04:04 AM
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Quote:
__________________
"I fly this plane for my country, when it stops flying it's not my fault, it's the countrys." CDR Fred "Bear" Vogt. The Last Skipper of VF-33's, F-4's. A veteran - whether active duty, retired, national guard or reserve - is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to "The United States of America", for an amount of "up to and including my life." That is honor, and there are way too many people in this country who no longer understand it. -- Author Unknown
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#9
07-31-2005, 04:55 PM
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Quote:
__________________
"I fly this plane for my country, when it stops flying it's not my fault, it's the countrys." CDR Fred "Bear" Vogt. The Last Skipper of VF-33's, F-4's. A veteran - whether active duty, retired, national guard or reserve - is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to "The United States of America", for an amount of "up to and including my life." That is honor, and there are way too many people in this country who no longer understand it. -- Author Unknown
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