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Old 02-17-2017, 05:59 PM
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Boats Boats is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Chicago, IL
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Talking The "M" Word... by Jeff Foxworthy

The "M" Word... by Jeff Foxworthy

Have you ever wondered why it's OK to make jokes about Catholics, Jews, Christians, the Pope, the Irish, the Italians, the Polish, the Hungarians, the Chinese, the French (including French Canadians), the elderly, bad golfers, men/women, blacks/whites, etc, but its insensitive to make jokes about the Muslims? Well, it's time to level the playing field by including our friends, the Muslims, on this grandiose list.

So Jeff Foxworthy did his part to include the Muslims on his list ...

1. If you grow and refine heroin for a living, but morally
object to the use of liquor, You may be a Muslim.

2. If you own a $3,000 machine gun and a $5,000 rocket
launcher, but can't afford shoes, You may be a Muslim.

3. If you have more wives than teeth, You may be a Muslim.

4. If you wipe your butt with your bare hand, but consider
bacon to be unclean, You may be a Muslim.

5. If you think vests come in two styles, Bullet-proof and
suicide, You may be a Muslim.

6. If you can't think of anyone that you haven't
declared jihad against, You may be a Muslim.

7. If you consider television dangerous, but routinely carry
explosives in your clothing, You may be a Muslim.

8. If you were amazed to discover that cell phones have
uses, other than setting off roadside bombs, You may be
a Muslim.

9. If you have nothing against women and think every man
should own at least four, then you, too, may be a Muslim.

10. If you find this offensive and do not forward it, you just
could be part of the problem here in America…but if you
delete this, you are most likely a Muslim.
__________________
Boats

O Almighty Lord God, who neither slumberest nor sleepest; Protect and assist, we beseech thee, all those who at home or abroad, by land, by sea, or in the air, are serving this country, that they, being armed with thy defence, may be preserved evermore in all perils; and being filled with wisdom and girded with strength, may do their duty to thy honour and glory; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

"IN GOD WE TRUST"
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