May God Hold Him In The Palm Of His Hand

[frisco-kid]

Kath and I made the 400mi. drive from Alexandria, VA, to Easthampton, MA, yesterday. After checking into our hotel in the neighboring town of Holyoke, we headed for O'Brien's Funeral Home for Tom's wake, getting there at about 6:30PM. The place was packed. Tom's casket was set up in a parlor room. It was draped in a flag and surrounded by two display frames of Andy's military medals; a large frame displaying his citations for 3 Purple Hearts, his Army discharge certificate, his diploma from the police academy, etc.; a collage of photographs of Andy from baby pictures to not-too-long-ago snapshots of him; a unit banner from the mech unit that he served with in the 25th ID; and some other things that I can't recall right now. Annette, Andy's mother, his two son's with their spouse/fiance, and other family members were seated around the perimeter of the room. After viewing the coffin and display, standing there alone for a moment with Tom just letting him know that we were there, we approached Annette's chair and introduced ourselves. She was very touched by us making the trip up to pay our respects. We told her we would have driven twice the distance if we had to. We proceeded down the line giving our condolences to the rest of the family. I was drawn back to the casket to whisper another communication with my Brother, barely holding it together. We then went to dinner in downtown Northampton.

Earlier in the day we had talked to Sid [thanks John] and told him where we were staying. He made reservations to the same hotel. After flying into Boston and renting a car, he too, made it to O'Brien's for the wake. He then checked into the hotel and gave us a call while we were eating our dinner. After dinner we went to the hotel restaraunt to find Sid. We sat there visiting with him while he ate a HUGE pot pie. Kath couldn't resist having a creme broullet [sp]. We then went to our rooms to get a little more comfortable, and Sid came down to our room and we caught up with each other's lives and reminisced about Andy until after midnight.

This morning we met for the hotel's continental breakfast. We sat there visiting until about 10:00, when we decided we had better head for the church to make sure we got a parking spot. We got there just as the funeral home people were getting there. We watched them as they wheeled the casket in and set up pretty much the same display as they had the night before for the wake. Some of the members of the local VFW then placed an American flag and their VFW flag at each end of the casket, completing the display. We asked the funeral director if we could take some pictures to share with all of Andy's Brothers and Sisters here on the Patriot files. He thought it was a good idea. After taking some picture's, there were still no family and just a couple of guest present. Sid and I took the opportunity to each spend a moment alone with Andy, telling him our individual farewells. We were all three very emotional and took comfort from each other's presence.

Through a window looking out into the front parking lot I saw the police department honor guard arriving, getting ready for their entrance into the church. I rounded up Kath and Sid with our cameras, and we went outside to find whoever was in charge of the policemen. We found the Easthampton Chief Of Police, Bruce McMahon. We introduced ourselves and asked if we could take some pictures of him and his officers, explaining why. He immediately said, "You just tell me what you want, and we'll do it." He then lined up all of the police officers present into two rows for a group shot for us. A really nice guy.

We then went back into the church [it was about 18F outside] to stake out our seats. While standing watching the activities and the other mourners arrive, the funeral director approached Sid and I. He asked if we could be Pall Bearers for Andy! We answered him in unison, "We'd be honored." We were shown where we would be sitting in the front row, with Kath in the second row behind us. Us Pall Bearers ceremoniously entered the church directly behind the police honor guard.

The service proceeded as Curtis so eloquently described. It was great hearing anecdotes about Andy from his sons, friends, and fellow police officers, including Chief McMahon, describing Andy's wit and sense of humor. I was tempted to get up and share some of my cherished memories of Andy, but I knew I'd never keep it together. My emotions were always just below the surface as it was.

At the end of the service we Pall Bearers escorted the casket, still on the wheeled cart, out of the church led by the honor guard. The casket was rolled to the end of the hearse. The six of us then lifted it off of the cart and helped slide it into the back. My hands lingered for a moment as I said a final good-bye to my friend.

"Live your life as such, that even the undertaker will be saddened by your passing." Mark Twain

Andy did that.

You will be sorely missed, my friend. The world is a poorer place without your presence in it. But you will live on forever in the memories of all the people that knew you and loved you. I'll never forget you, Tom.

[frisco-kid]

A Message from Kath

I just wanted to say a few words myself. Although I had never met Andy I spoke to him on the phone several times. He would call and pretend that he was an obscene caller. I of course would play right into his preverted ways and we would then just start laughing. I will miss that.

I want to say how proud I was today of Tom (Frisco) and Sid. They handled the task of pall bearers with pride. I know that they were honored that Andy's family wanted them to help escort Andy along the way. Tom and Sid also showed that men aren't affraid to show emotion at the loss of a loved one. I sat in the row with the police men next to me and behind me and they too were unafraid to show emotion. To me it said Andy was loved by all. All and all it was a very emotional morning. A military funeral plus being a retired policeman brings out the emotional feelings of everyone. I am very glad we were able to attend for those of you that wanted to go but were unable. Annette said that she checked the Patriot Files and was very overwhelmed with emotion as she and her sons read all of the nice things you all said about Andy. She will continue to do that so if you look and it says that "Andy" is online, it's Annette.

We will be posting pictures tomorrow night. Tomorrow I am taking Tom to the "wall" for his first visit. I actually found it quite fitting that we had attended a funeral of yet another Vietnam casualty. It is quite an injustice that the veterans that have lost their lives years after the Vietnam was over will never be honored on the wall as they should be.

I am so glad that Tom and I were able to pay our last respects to Andy. He will live in our hearts forever.

Kath (Mrs. Frisco)

[sn-e3]

Tom thank you so much for the update on the funeral. I feel as though I was there thanks again

[Bill Farnie]

Thank you Sid, Tom, Kath and Curtis

[DMZ-LT]

Well done. Thank you

[39mto39g]

I don't go to funerals, I can't handle it. And I don't like that.
Thanks Tom

[b3196]

Thanks everyone
Bob K

[Tina]

thank you tom

[VIETNAM 1968]

Thank you Tom, Kathy, Curtis and Sid for attending Andy's Funeral. You people did an outstanding job of representing all the rest of us on the Patriot Files, that were unable to be there IN PERSON. As for me, well, I was there IN SPIRIT. I was thinking of Andy, and his funeral, while it was going on. All the memories of the help that Andy was to me came rushing back and I started to break up. Damn those SANDSTORMS. They can come up without any warning and be most embarrassing some time.

Andy's body may be gone but he will never be forgotten from MY MIND. I will always remember him for the way he chose to be--A kind hearted and caring person that did not mind helping out others in need.

Bless you Brother. Hopefully I will be privileged to see you, and my Buddy Alan, again if I am deemed good enough to join you in Heaven some day.

As for the rest of my Vietnam Veteran Brothers and Sisters I again wish you a heart felt:

WELCOME HOME:


VIETNAM 1968

[MORTARDUDE]

Thanks to all for sharing. As someone above said, I felt like I was there, and I was in spirit.

As Andy said many, many times "Stay healthy".

May God Bless,

Larry