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Old 07-18-2003, 09:53 PM
bigblackbravo bigblackbravo is offline
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Lightbulb Why We Attacked Iraq

worth reading all the way.

Q: Daddy, why did we have to attack Iraq?
A: Because they had weapons of mass destruction, honey.

Q: But the inspectors didn't find any weapons of mass destruction.
A: That's because the Iraqis were hiding them.

Q: And that's why we invaded Iraq?
A: Yep. Invasions always work better than inspections.

Q: But after we invaded them, we STILL didn't find any weapons of mass
destruction, did we?
A: That's because the weapons are so well hidden. Don't worry, we'll find
something, probably right before the 2004 election.

Q: Why did Iraq want all those weapons of mass destruction?
A: To use them in a war, silly.

Q: I'm confused. If they had all those weapons that they planned to use in a
war, then why didn't they use any of those weapons when we went to war with
them?
A: Well, obviously they didn't want anyone to know they had those weapons,
so they chose to die by the thousands rather than defend themselves.

Q: That doesn't make sense Daddy. Why would they choose to die if they had
all those big weapons to fight us back with?
A: It's a different culture. It's not supposed to make sense.

Q: I don't know about you, but I don't think they had any of those weapons
our government said they did.
A: Well, you know, it doesn't matter whether or not they had those weapons.
We had another good reason to invade them anyway.

Q: And what was that?
A: Even if Iraq didn't have weapons of mass destruction, Saddam Hussein was
a cruel dictator, which is another good reason to invade another country.

Q: Why? What does a cruel dictator do that makes it OK to invade his
country?
A: Well, for one thing, he tortured his own people.

Q: Kind of like what they do in China?
A: Don 't go comparing China to Iraq. China is a good economic competitor,
where millions of people work for slave wages in sweatshops to make U.S.
corporations richer.

Q: So if a country lets its people be exploited for American corporate gain,
it's a good country, even if that country tortures people?
A: Right.

Q: Why were people in Iraq being tortured?
A: For political crimes, mostly, like criticizing the government. People who
criticized the government in Iraq were sent to prison and tortured.

Q: Isn't that exactly what happens in China?
A: I told you, China is different.

Q: What's the difference between China and Iraq?
A: Well, for one thing, Iraq was ruled by the Ba'ath party, while China is
Communist.

Q: Didn't you once tell me Communists were bad?
A: No, just Cuban Communists are bad.

Q: How are the Cuban Communists bad?
A: Well, for one thing, people who criticize the government in Cuba are sent
to prison and tortured.

Q: Like in Iraq?
A: Exactly.

Q: And like in China, too?
A: I told you, China's a good economic competitor. Cuba, on the other hand,
is not.

Q: How come Cuba isn't a good economic competitor?
A: Well, you see, back in the early 1960s, our government passed some laws
that made it illegal for Americans to trade or do any business with Cuba
until they stopped being Communists and started being capitalists like us.

Q: But if we got rid of those laws, opened up trade with Cuba, and started
doing business with them, wouldn't that help the Cubans become capitalists?
A: Don't be a smart-ass.

Q: I didn't think I was being one.
A: Well, anyway, they also don't have freedom of religion in Cuba.

Q: Kind of like China and the @!#$ movement?
A: I told you, stop saying bad things about China. Anyway, Saddam Hussein
came to power through a military coup, so he's not really a legitimate
leader anyway.

Q: What's a military coup?
A: That's when a military general takes over the government of a country by
force, instead of holding free elections like we do in the United States.

Q: Didn't the ruler of Pakistan come to power by a military coup?
A: You mean General Pervez Musharraf? Uh, yeah, he did, but Pakistan is our
friend.

Q: Why is Pakistan our friend if their leader is illegitimate?
A: I never said Pervez Musharraf was illegitimate.

Q: Didn't you just say a military general who comes to power by forcibly
overthrowing the legitimate government of a nation is an illegitimate
leader?
A: Only Saddam Hussein. Pervez Musharraf is our friend, because he helped us
invade Afghanistan.

Q: Why did we invade Afghanistan?
A: Because of what they did to us on September 11th.

Q: What did Afghanistan do to us on September 11th?
A: Well, on September 11th, nineteen men, fifteen of them Saudi Arabians,
hijacked four airplanes and flew three of them into buildings, killing over
3,000 Americans.

Q: So how did Afghanistan figure into all that?
A: Afghanistan was where those bad men trained, under the oppressive rule of
the Taliban.

Q: Aren't the Taliban those bad radical Islamics who chopped off people's
heads and hands?
A: Yes, that's exactly who they were. Not only did they chop off people's
heads and hands, but they oppressed women, too.

Q: Didn't the Bush administration give the Taliban 43 million dollars back
in May of 2001?
A: Yes, but that money was a reward because they did such a good job
fighting drugs.

Q: Fighting drugs?
A: Yes, the Taliban were very helpful in stopping people from growing opium
poppies.

Q: How did they do such a good job?
A: Simple. If people were caught growing opium poppies, the Taliban would
have their hands and heads cut off.

Q: So, when the Taliban cut off people's heads and hands for growing
flowers, that was OK, but not if they cut people's heads and hands off for
other reasons?
A: Yes. It's OK with us if radical Islamic fundamentalists cut off people's
hands for growing flowers, but it's cruel if they cut off people's hands for
stealing bread.

Q: Don't they also cut off people's hands and heads in Saudi Arabia?
A: That's different. Afghanistan was ruled by a tyrannical patriarchy that
oppressed women and forced them to wear burqas whenever they were in public,
with death by stoning as the penalty for women who did not comply.


Q: Don't Saudi women have to wear burqas in public, too?
A: No, Saudi women merely wear a traditional Islamic body covering.

Q: What's the difference?
A: The traditional Islamic covering worn by Saudi women is a modest yet
fashionable garment that covers all of a woman's body except for her eyes
and fingers. The burqa, on the other hand, is an evil tool of patriarchal
oppression that covers all of a woman's body except for her eyes and
fingers.

Q: It sounds like the same thing with a different name.
A: Now, don't go comparing Afghanistan and Saudi Arabia. The Saudis are our
friends.

Q: But I thought you said 15 of the 19 hijackers on September 11th were from
Saudi Arabia.
A: Yes, but they trained in Afghanistan.

Q: Who trained them?
A: A very bad man named Osama bin Laden.

Q: Was he from Afghanistan?
A: Uh, no, he was from Saudi Arabia too. But he was a bad man, a very bad
man.

Q: I seem to recall he was our friend once.
A: Only when we helped him and the mujahadeen repel the Soviet invasion of
Afghanistan back in the 1980s.

Q: Who are the Soviets? Was that the Evil Communist Empire Ronald Reagan
talked about?
A: There are no more Soviets. The Soviet Union broke up in 1990 or
thereabouts, and now they have elections and capitalism like us. We call
them Russians now.

Q: So the Soviets, I mean, the Russians, are now our friends?
A: Well, not really. You see, they were our friends for many years after
they stopped being Soviets, but then they decided not to support our
invasion of Iraq, so we're mad at them now. We're also mad at the French and
the Germans because they didn't help us invade Iraq either.

Q: So the French and Germans are evil, too?
A: Not exactly evil, but just bad enough that we had to rename French fries
and French toast to Freedom Fries and Freedom Toast.

Q: Do we always rename foods whenever another country doesn't do what we
want them to do?
A: No, we just do that to our friends. Our enemies, we invade.

Q: But wasn't Iraq one of our friends back in the 1980s?
A: Well, yeah. For a while.

Q: Was Saddam Hussein ruler of Iraq back then?
A: Yes, but at the time he was fighting against Iran, which made him our
friend, temporarily.

Q: Why did that make him our friend?
A: Because at that time, Iran was our enemy.

Q: Isn't that when he gassed the Kurds?
A: Yeah, but since he was fighting against Iran at the time, we looked the
other way, to show him we were his friend.

Q: So anyone who fights against one of our enemies automatically becomes our
friend?
A: Most of the time, yes.

Q: And anyone who fights against one of our friends is automatically an
enemy?
A: Sometimes that's true, too. However, if American
corporations can profit by selling weapons to both sides at the same time,
all the better.

Q: Why?
A: Because war is good for the economy, which means war is good for America.
Also, since God is on America's side, anyone whoopposes war is a godless un-American Communist. Do you understand now why we attacked Iraq?

Q: I think so. We attacked them because God wanted us to, right?
A: Yes.

Q: But how did we know God wanted us to attack Iraq?
A: Well, you see, God personally speaks to George W. Bush and tells him what
to do.

Q: So basically, what you're saying is that we attacked Iraq because George
W. Bush hears voices in his head? A. Yes! You finally understand how theworld works. Now close your eyes, make yourself comfortable, and go to sleep. Good night.

Q: Good night, Daddy
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*Bravo out*
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  #2  
Old 07-18-2003, 10:01 PM
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MORTARDUDE MORTARDUDE is offline
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Great Post !!!! It is all about the Benjamins .... $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$



Larry
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Old 07-18-2003, 11:55 PM
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SEATJERKER SEATJERKER is offline
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Default Don't think...

...or believe that...

...yes, it's a good funny post, and alot that was said is probably true, but the FACT remains that there are "bad" people out there that do unspeakable things to innocent people, and by virtue of communication, "we" as in the people of this GOD loving Nation understand that no man, woman, or creature should ever have to live under oppression, and torture, and now it is nanoseconds away from being exposed to the rest of the world everyday...

...It's a matter of enforcing the 'laws" of common decency weather home, or abroad...

...No WMD's,.... NOT YET, OBL was a camel jockey, ducking, and hiding, Sadumb was greedy, and cruel, and openly brass about it, Sadumb was stupid enough to sit, there, and say "no one dare challenge my power", he should have sat back, and lived out his days with his gazillions of $$$$$$$$$, but NOOOOOOOOOO.....

...China will have it's own rebellion all to it self eventually, their people will surely get pissed enough soon enough...

...the other ticklers such as that "pesky North Korea" will fly into the light until morning again, and again, but I don't believe they want to be lit up by day...

...Now Iran is a whole new ballgame, processing the hot stuff in the middle east with India, and Pakistan allready holding a pair,... 3 of a kind doesn't fit in that hand especially since we got 4 dueces spread up different sleeves, by which I mean, better to slam 4 little ones around, and keep that pair from growing,...

...If being the world's cops are what we have to be, so be it, what was that famous line "better to fight them there, then here", well with the modern marvels of science, just about any asshole with ANY system of checks, and balances, can, learn, or buy the end of mankind as we know it, and it's a matter of minutes now, not years of bullets, and cannon balls... The time is now to look ahead, and find them first, and STOP them first before they ever get close, I'm all for preemptive strikes if the facts are true, and confirmed that any group of "persons" are ploting, or even "threatening" the wellfare of America...

...the rats are getting bigger, faster, meaner, and with no remorse for whoever, or whatever is in their way, so the same applies in the opposite sense, if thats what it takes to protect the everyday innocent masses, then thats what are conscience leads us to do, then just do it...

...do we like having to go as far as we have?, no, but will we continue, no doubt about it,...

FOR AS LONG AS WE BREATH FREE, WE MUST HELP ALL OTHERS TO DO SO ALSO...
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..."Have I got a story for you!"

Tom "ANDY" Andrzejczyk

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  #4  
Old 07-19-2003, 05:59 AM
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Good news : In Iran there is a great deal of unrest and a revolution is on the horizon..spearheaded by the same types of students who took our hostages in 1979...go figure...and in North Korea the illustrious leader is sleeping in a different place every night a la Sadumb.. because he is scared shitless...

Good always triumps over evil...says so in the Bible... and I do believe all of that..

Larry
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