Honoring american flags

[BLUEHAWK]

A possible thread toward healing, if it flies?
It is the tradition here in a nearby southern Missouri village to allow graduating seniors the painting of large murals on the street near school. So long as the images are within moral/legal boundaries no censorship is exercised. But last Spring, a group of girls and boys chose to present a confederate battle flag, the same scale as all the other murals. For weeks thereafter the expected tumult went back and forth in news and editorial pages. To their credit the kids, their parents and the school held fast throughout the storm. None of the comments offered had anything at all to do with the flag nor with the Civil War as it was. The kids and the flag were villified. But, Missouri was a border state before hostilities in 1860, and seceded only to have the legislature chased down to this end of our territory for the duration. A federal unionist replacement was imposed.
Not many years ago an otherwise arguably effective senator from Illinois stood before her colleagues in the chamber and demanded, to vociferous acclaim, withdrawal of a recognition customarily given to Daughters of the Confederacy on the grounds, mainly, that the Confederate flag was part of their emblem. She lost her next election.
The battle flag, as it is commonly understood,
is NOT the "stars and bars", though most think it is. Almost no history is taught, and is not allowed to be taught, which would be equivalent with teachings as to the evolution of our stars and stripes. Yet, under both banners our fallen died for freedom, are buried in our soil, and came from families who will always remember. Generally speaking, both sides acknowledged this true union at the time and during the conflict.
Last September 12th I joined in solidarity with other americans in defiantly flying the stars and stripes which had draped a family member's casket at his military funeral. However, as if to say, "We are ALL americans", I also proudly flew a mid-sized Confederate banner. They flew together.
Post-Reconstruction era associations with which the battle flag has been linked are probably, one surmises, a major cause of the emblem being scorned so vehemently. Yet, victors and vanquished live side by side still today in common purpose.
The thread then...What might be the best way, if any, to alter course so that our children are taught to honor BOTH flags as american?