My own little protest.

[Packo]

As of Friday, Deb and I have stopped buying anything French. Now, I am a lover of French Wine but I also have had enough of their Whining. Thursday went to the liquor store and had my wine girl pick out wines of many nations and states. We are finding them just as good. (well, close enough) She told me that I wasn't the only one nolonger buying French wines and booze. Grey Goose Vodka is French made and one of her custormers that only drinks it has switched to another brand. She says some have been ignorant about it and have given her crap for still selling French stuff. I was not one of them. I am also not buying anything German, and other than chocolate, I can't think of a damn thing the Belgiums have other than waffles.

Good bye French Fries! Good bye French Toast! And, I need to find a whole new way of kissing Deb!

Packo

[Keith_Hixson]

A Southern Rednecked Baptist drinking French Wine! Now that is sin! God's getting even with you! White Lightening is one thing, but French Wine. I'm so disappointed in you! Get your act together fellow! I'm sure glad you are Reformed in your Theology or you'd be in real trouble.
I understand that Deb is happy about this reform. LOL

Keith

[Andy]

After the French would not allow us to fly over their country to bomb Kadafi, I quite French wine. Both California and (of all places) Argentina make excellent wine. It's less pretentious and less pricey. French Vodka is a contradiction in terms, even if it is good. I've stopped buying French cheese. French Fries are actually Steak Fries.

Packo: It's also called a soul kiss, do that brother blood.

Keith: It must be an ultra-reformed Baptist church. No bingo night, they play black jack and five card draw.

Don't anyone go to Paris. If you want to be insulted go to Boston and drive slowly, anywhere in the city.

Stay healthy,
Andy

[SuperScout]

Andy, and others,
May I first of all congratulate you on your decision to eschew products from the Frogs! And here's a suggestion about wines: speaking from personal experience, until I had to quit several years ago, I can vouch for some Texas wines, specifically Falls Creek and Llano Estacado. The Falls Creek vineyard in up on Lake Buchanan, and has produced some world class sippins', and the Llano Estacado is from the Lubbock region. Ask your local liquor stores to stock them, if they don'thave them already. Enjoy!! And if I may be so bold: Phuck the Phrench!

[Seascamp]

Let?s see now, Belgium? Isn?t that the stretch of foggy-ass highway between Holland and France where they all crash and burn because no one will slow up for the fog? As I recall that?s also the place where they get all pissy if ya don?t spell Brussels ?Bruxxels?.

I never developed a taste for anything French so I don?t have anything to give up I suppose. So how about I give up talking to whiney Frenchmen when they bring me their silly machinery problems to look at. I?ll delegate all that I?m thinking. They are a pain in the butt to deal with anyway and seldom if ever pay their bills without getting beat about the head and shoulders severely by the bill collector.
Scamp

[xgrunt]

afoot to rename French fries to Freedom Fries. Supersize those Freedom Fries son. :cl:

[39mto39g]

All the wine in france come from vines they got from California.
Seems along time ago some people brought vines from france to california and not to long after that there was a Grapevine die off in france due to some fungus, it killed all the vines in france and then died itself. France went to California and got vines to bring back to france.

Ron

[SEATJERKER]

...right now the Spanish wines are "in" due to aged in oak casks, and have more bite to them...

...Sumaracca has 2 wines out that I bought for my wife, and she likes the "spice" taste with a smooth finish, Tempranillo...

...the white is a Chardanay...
...often thought about taking the wife to Paris" on on of those romantic getaways,... but that dream seems to have been shot to hell, looks like Cancun is moving on up...

...Don't need, or use much of France, so I'm not out anything, but I'm sure they will need us again when their over run with tribbles...

[VF24F8C]

Since Paco started this....

The Complete Military History of France?

- Gallic Wars - Lost. In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of French history, France is
conquered by of all things, an Italian.

- Hundred Years War - Mostly lost, saved at last by female schizophrenic who inadvertently creates
The First Rule of French Warfare:
"France's armies are victorious only when not led by a Frenchman." Sainted.

- Italian Wars - Lost. France becomes the first and only country to ever lose two wars when fighting Italians.

- Wars of Religion - France goes 0-5-4 against the Huguenots

- Thirty Years War - France is technically not a participant, but manages to get invaded anyway.
Claims a tie on the basis that eventually the other participants started ignoring her.

- War of Revolution - Tied. Frenchmen take to wearing red flowerpots as chapeaux.

- The Dutch War - Tied.

- War of the Augsburg League/King William's War/French and Indian War - Lost, but claimed as a tie.
Three ties in a row induces deluded Frogophiles the world over to label the period as the height of French military
power.

- War of the Spanish Succession - Lost. The War also gave the French their first taste of a Marlborough,
which they have loved every since.

- American Revolution - In a move that will become quite familiar to future Americans, France claims a win
even though the English colonists saw far more action.
This is later known as the "de Gaulle Syndrome", and leads to
The Second Rule of French Warfare:
"France only wins when America does most of the fighting."

- French Revolution - Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French.

- The Napoleonic Wars - Lost. Temporary victories (remember the First Rule!) due to leadership of a
Corsican, who ended up being no match for a British footwear designer.

- The Franco-Prussian War - Lost. Germany first plays the role of drunk Frat boy to France's ugly girl home
alone on a Saturday night.

- World War I - Tied and on the way to losing, France is saved by the United States. Thousands of French
women find out what it's like to not only sleep with a winner, but one who doesn't call her
"Fraulein." Sadly, widespread use of condoms by American forces forestalls any improvement in
the French bloodline.

- World War II - Lost. Conquered French liberated by the United States and Britain just as they finish learning
the Horst Wessel Song.

- War in Indochina - Lost. French forces plead sickness, take to bed with the Dien Bien Flu

- Algerian Rebellion - Lost. Loss marks the first defeat of a western army by a Non-Turkic Muslim force since
the Crusades, and produces The First Rule of Muslim Warfare: "We can always
beat the French." [This rule is identical to the First Rules of the Italians, Russians,
Germans, English, Dutch, Spanish, Vietnamese and Esquimaux.]


- War on Terrorism - France, keeping in mind its recent history, surrenders to Germans and Muslims just to be
safe. Attempts to surrender to Vietnamese ambassador fail after he takes refuge in a
McDonald's.

The question for any country silly enough to count on the French should not be "Can we count on the French?", but rather "How long until France collapses?"

"Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without an accordion. All you do is leave behind a lot of noisy baggage."

Or, better still, the quote from last week's Wall Street Journal:
"They're there when they need you."

Smitty

[VF24F8C]

Latest from Paris?

Paris, France (AP), February 9, 2003

Inspired by the recent commercial success of the United States Army's "Boot Camp" video game, the General Staff of the French Army has announced plans to market "Ultimate Surrender," a video game based upon the proud military traditions of the French Army.

In the latest French video game players follow the exploits of Lucky Pierre, an apprentice garlic salesman from Marseilles, as he joins the French Army and begins a rigorous course of combat training.

The First Level of the game is called "Survival School," in which the players have to help Lucky Pierre survive 24 hours without red wine or cr?me brul?.

The Second Level is "Capitulation," and the goal here is to see which player can have Lucky Pierre surrender the fastest without firing a shot or getting his uniform dirty.

Level Three is titled "Collaboration." Here the players battle to see who can collect the largest numbers of nylon stockings and packages of chocolates by having Lucky Pierre perform sexual favors for members of the occupying forces.

Level Four is "Be Ungrateful to America for Rescuing Your Sorry French Ass Once Again." In this extremely challenging part of the game contestants vie with one another to see who can make Lucky Pierre behave in the surliest manner when the United States inevitably comes to the rescue of the defeated French.

The Final Level is "Pretending to Have Been in the Resistance." Here contestants compete in a battle of tall tales and whoppers as they try to protect Lucky Pierre from treason charges.

Marketing tests show that "Ultimate Surrender" is a big hit with French teenagers and young adults who are too young to have experienced France's lightening surrender to the Germans in 1940 or its defeat by the Vietnamese in 1954 at Dien Bien Phu.

"Zees is a great tool to inspire ze patriotism in ze youths, n'est ce pas?" said General Jean-Jacques Loseur, Commander-in-Chief of the French Army, during his weekly press conference. "Since ze end of ze Cold War we French have not had many opportunities to surrender or to show great cowardice in the face of much weaker opponents."

When questioned about comments made in the French Chamber of Deputies that "Ultimate Surrender" makes the French Army look like a bunch of gutless mama's boys, General Loseur pulled out a white handkerchief, put his hands over his head and said, "Oh heck, I give up."

Smitty