One for Ron

[catman]

Thought I would post this for Ron after all the grief you guys gave him over his daughter. Not sure where it came from, my wife brought it home from work.

Trav


A Firemen?s Little Girl

I am very dedicated to the fire department. I wear firefighter shirts as often as I can even when I?m not with the department. The fire department is my second home, and my second family. It often seems as if my life revolves around the fire department, but it means nothing compared to my little girl. I am normally a very friendly person, but if you hurt my little girl you will make me mad. I know my little girl is growing up, even if I don?t like it. She seems to like you, so I?ll tolerate you going out with her, but there are a few things for you to think about while you are with her:

First of all, I go into burning buildings to save people that I?ve never even seen before, you can?t imagine how protective I am of my little girl.

I once broke a man?s sternum by accident while doing CPR to save his life. If that?s how I help people, what do you think I would do when I?m pissed off?

I investigate arson fires. I know exactly what clues to look for to prove it was arson?so I know how to do it so nobody can tell how the fire started?and I know where you live. Remember Backdraft?

I?ve worked more car accidents than you?ll ever see; the sight of blood doesn?t bother me one little bit.

It?s normal for me to carry chainsaws, axes, and various other extremely sharp tools in my truck?touch my little girl and you and me will take a little ride.

When we burn down a house for training, nobody ever looks in the closets.

I use the Jaws of Life to tear doors off wrecked cars. They cut through solid metal like a hot knife through butter. So watch your paws or get the jaws.

Sirens and air horns can really muffle the sounds of someone screaming.

Most of my friends are cops, paramedics, or firefighters. WE ARE 911.
If you make me mad who do you think you?re going to call for help?

I have access to explosives.

I am well trained in emergency medicine. I know exactly which arteries are the easiest to sever and which ones bleed the most (Remember all the sharp tools?)

Even though my little girl insists that you are a ?nice guy? and not like most other guys, I know better. I was once your age; I know EXACTLY what you are thinking. Because of that I already have plenty of reasons not to like you. It wouldn?t take much at all to push me over the edge, and I just sharpened my axe.

So if you want to go out with my little girl you better keep things in mind. Firemen are protective by nature, and there is nothing we are more protective of than our little girls. Whenever you?re alone with her, you better remember that someday you may be alone with me!