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#1
05-21-2004, 09:20 AM
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Closeure,...
...24/6,... almost 24 years 6 months ago I went to a gunfight without a gun, I won, but I lost,...
...Closeure ...for me there isn't any, for most of you, you left it behind when you left "in country", but I can't leave the way you all did, there has been no acceptence,(other then here), from the powers that be, and my restlessness, and has compounded itself, and continues to do so,... ...tomorrow the DAV will offically install me at the officers installation dinner as Jr. Vice Commander of Chapter #38, and yet, the United States Air Force refuses to accept the evidence of my participation at "the Natchitoches Christmas Light festival 01 Dec 79",... ...I have just about given up on ever finding any direct witnesses after all this time, and of all the evidence I have presented to prove my case through the AFBCMR, even with the letters from the police chief himself, it has just been shelved, so now I have what I consider to be my last C+P exam on Monday, after bailing out on the one last week(when my walls close in, they close tight), so here I sit, and ponder clousure, and how to find it,... ...I found great comfort with the trip to Georgia, and it helped to be in the same "room" with some of the greatest men I have ever known, but here at "home", the situation never changes, my wife has been as understanding as anyone could be, but will never understand the horrors of that night, I hear a thousand screams every night, and one lone infant's , his accomplice blows my head off every night, and I ache every morning as my grip on his wrists is ever present, I cannot remove the blood, and flesh from my face, nor the piss from my memory no matter how many times I wash, my teeth break on regular intervals due to gritting/grinding in my sleep, so its off to the dentist again, and again, I have to walk these streets, and these streets are the same as those, I cannot leave my "in country" for my "in country" is this country,... ...I don't know how vent other then here, so trying to "keep movin' is diffucult, but 24/6 is upon me in 10 days, and 25 years flat is approaching even sooner, 25 years of the same shi+ night, after night has worn me thin,... ...thank you for your support, do I feel better, hell no, but, this is who I am,... ... ...
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"Let me tell you a story" ..."Have I got a story for you!" Tom "ANDY" Andrzejczyk ... 
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#2
03-16-2009, 05:41 PM
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29 years, 4 months,...
...
... ...It's been a while,... ...Packo, Thank you for your help today, Sometimes I know it is diffucult to understand why when the guy goes to the doctor hitting himself in the head with the hammer, he doesn't stop,... ...Self vindication from all those that doubted you, or dismissed your truth's disclaiming your involvement in a life threatening, and life saving situation from so many years ago,... ...Thank you all for being there for me down the line, and further down the road,... ...Recieved this today, and for what it is worth, I will send it to the AFBMCR for their review, and if after all of this, if it isn't good enough, Oh Well! I did my best for the United States Air Force during my time in service, and I did my Duty that night off base while saving lives,... ...There will never be "true closeure" in it's entirity for many of us, but with this, I can let go of some of the past with the fact that after so long, one letter from my Colonel affirms a long forgotten night by many,... ...Curtis' "The PTSD Survivor",... ...
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"Let me tell you a story" ..."Have I got a story for you!" Tom "ANDY" Andrzejczyk ...
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#3
03-16-2009, 08:39 PM
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Curtis DO NOT LET THE BASTARDS WIN, I will pray for you and I offer what assistance I can to help you thru this, e-mail me and send me your number I will call you.
Coachman Vietnam Vet.
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Count it the greatest sin to prefer life to honor, and for the sake of living to lose what makes it worth living. -Juvenal C.50-C.130 “Fathom the hypocrisy of a Government that requires every citizen to prove they are insured……but not everyone must prove they are a citizen.”
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#4
03-17-2009, 08:12 AM
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Curtis
We can't read what you posted...too small.
Fill us in on what it says. Must be from your old LT/LtCol. Good luck but remember what I said about Tilting at Windmills. Pack
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"TO ANNOUNCE THAT THERE MUST BE NO CRITICISM OF THE PRESIDENT...IS MORALLY TREASONABLE TO THE AMERICAN PUBLIC." Theodore Roosvelt "DISSENT IS PATRIOTIC!" (unknown people for the past 8 years, my turn now)
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#7
03-17-2009, 03:16 PM
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Curtis just what
Do you want from the AF. Basically the VA quantified your claim by giving you PTSD benefits for what most of us consider a trivial incident. I just dont understand most of us would consider the incident as you have described it as a fun night out. Not trying to shoot you down but just don't get it.
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#8
03-17-2009, 04:21 PM
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Curtis..
Now that I've read the former LT's/Lt.Col's note.....you need to focus on today, your new family, and put this in your old kit bag and smile, smile, smile. You are NOT going to get what you feel you need from the Air Force. Remember what we talked about.
Pack Sid...did I tell you about the mango incident in Nha Trang?
__________________
"TO ANNOUNCE THAT THERE MUST BE NO CRITICISM OF THE PRESIDENT...IS MORALLY TREASONABLE TO THE AMERICAN PUBLIC." Theodore Roosvelt "DISSENT IS PATRIOTIC!" (unknown people for the past 8 years, my turn now)
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Thats how he got
Hybrid Mode
