Lies!

Those bears, you can't trust'em come berry time. Well I'd got my ten quart pail half
full when up comes a big old he bear aslavering and grunting. Wanted my berries. So I
ups and shot him right in the ear three, four times. Fur didn't look so bad so I took my
pail and rifle back to the buckboard and went back to skin'im out. Big hide; Mister.
Tried lugging it by the tail but it keep ketching on every bush so I ups and puts it over
my back and shoulders. Waal, I hadn't got more'n fifty yards when a big old sow bear
comes out of the bushes and blocks my way. I says Howdy and starts walking polite around
the critter but she rars up and blocks my way again. You know what, Mister? I had to
screw that old sow bear four times afore she let me pass.

That's enough about bears.


Tales of the Old U.P., Culley Gage

Engineer
And now you know what my winter reading list looks like.