finally got served my divorce papers and moving on Novemeber 11th...

[MORTARDUDE]

I hadn't been served after 16 days so I had to call my wife's lawyer and the Sheriff's substation and drive 15 miles to get it. It is not going to be pleasant... 'Nuf Sed..

I will be offline for awhile starting Wednesday 11/10..and until Time Warner / Roadrunner can get me hooked up at my Mom's house...

PM me and I will give you my new address, her land-line number, my cell phone number...

Please do not try to contact me at >> 901.386.7244 or

6523 Country Knoll Ct.
Bartlett, TN. 38135-1563

after 11/10/2004

Thanks.

Larry

[b3196]

Good Luck, Larry
If you need anything just call
Bob K

[goodnessgracie]

Godspeed, Larry

If you ever need a smile, give me a shout. Will PM my #.

All the best,
Gracie

[DMZ-LT]

Keep movin . I'll see you in April

[Tina]

Larry you are and always be in my prayers.. You have been down a rought road the last couple months.. I hope all goes well.. Please call if you need anything at all.. Like so many others here you are like a sencond Dad to me and I will always be here for you..
love ya
Your friend and God Bless,
Tina

[MORTARDUDE]

I am very naive when it comes to divorce...I haven't paid much attention to other folks trials and tribulations in the past 32 years, but should have. I suppose part of the process is to blame the spouse for everything that has gone bad, and paint them in the worst possible light, no matter what the real circumstances were...as I am writing this, I just realized, among my friends, relations, and folks at work, there were not that many people who got a divorce...It seems since I have been online, and talking to other folks locally, that those who get divorces, for whatever reason, seem to get multiple divorces....

question :

I realize every state is different...and should probably ask my lawyer these kinds of questions ( he charges $ 225 per hour ... OUCH !! ), but just curious ( from the combined experience on here ) what percentage of divorces are settled by both parties using the same lawyer and settling that way ( probably giving the female most of what she wants...just guessing )..or having 2 lawyers involved, trading offers, and settling that way, or using mediation ( saw this on the internet ), or actually going to trial and having a judge decide...( probably the least desirable of any of the options )

Since our kids are grown, we have filed chapter 7, have lost our house, and are still fairly civil with each other, this doesn't seem like it will be difficult, but since 2 lawyers are involved....well you know $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$...

any ideas, pitfalls, things to look out for..would be appreciated..you can PM me if you like...I am not going to get into any of the details on here....just general stuff....

I had a good day with my younger son yesterday...it helped me a lot....he helped me with the computer setup and I was able to help him with some of his problems..

I used to be a computer whiz myself ....( at least I thought I was ...tee hee...)...don't know what I would do without my son.....

May God Bless,

Larry

[Drywall]

Get your own lawyer Larry. $225/hour is way cheaper than the possibilty of losing all you've worked for in the past 32 years. I went thru it without a lawyer and got skunked. Had to sell my house too. I'm sure it would have been much better with my own lawyer.
As far as the cost, I had some real estate dealings many years ago. I hired a young lawyer who didn't know shit. I fired hime after about a month and a half and many dollars. I hired a new guy with real estate experiance for double the rate of the former. BUT.....he got it completely settled in 1/2 hour. Turned out he was much cheaper than the first one by virtue of his experiance and contacts.

[MontanaKid]

Drywall is right

You need your own lawyer. Plus it's a conflict of interest for one to represent both parties. It's a cheap price to pay, when you compare it to the costs you incur by not having anyone to represent your interests.

As my partner and I like to tell clients. When you need a new transmission, you don't think twice about paying the money. You may not want to come up with that much money, but you know your car needs a transmission, so you pay. It's the same with a legal matter. The money may seem big to you up front, but it pales in comparison to what you may pay down the road in a settlement or decree that is not in your best interest.

Ans as drywall said. If you try to go on the cheap, you get what you pay for and may well lose money. You don't have to hire the most expensive guy in town, but beware these guys who charge really low-ball. They are after volume. The quality of service they provide is often very shoddy. They expect to do little more than fill out the forms for you and walk it through court. It could cost you big in the end, unless your divorce is an open and shut thing with no kids, no assets or debt.

Neither side gets everything they want out of a divorce. I always counsel my clients against unrealistic expectations. The estate and other things you built together are going to be less for each of you.

Only one percent of divorces wind up going through a full trial before a judge. That's never the best way, because the Judge is then going to come down with a decree that neither of you will have a say in. And your attorney fees will be huge after a full trial.

The best way is to suck it up and pay the lawyer. The best way of avoiding paying too much in hourly time is to always be prepared for your meetings. Have all your records together, etc. wasted time can add up to more money so make the most of the time you do have. Save your questions for the meeting.

Unless it's a real emergency, phone calls, just to ask a question, add up to unnecessary expense. Just picking up the phone, incurs a time tick, sometimes 15 minutes, no matter how long the actual conversation is. The lowest time increment an attorney bills is usually .1 of a minute, that's at least six minutes of time you'll be billed for and maybe 15 if he bills in increments of .25 hour as many do. So it's best to write down your questions and have them with you in a meeting. You know you're going to pay for that whole hour, you might as well get the most out of it. At an appointment, your lawyer is, or should be, ready for you. If you call him on the phone, you've interrupted him from doing something else and he can't have his mind on your case the way he will when you have your appointment.

By the way, my divorce was final one hour ago. The judge was nice and did it quietly in chambers for me. I guess that's one of the perks of being a lawyer.

She put me right at ease, said she had been through it herself, and it was all very short and sweet.


Good Luck.

This, too, will pass.

Originally posted by MORTARDUDE I am very naive when it comes to divorce...I haven't paid much attention to other folks trials and tribulations in the past 32 years, but should have. I suppose part of the process is to blame the spouse for everything that has gone bad, and paint them in the worst possible light, no matter what the real circumstances were...as I am writing this, I just realized, among my friends, relations, and folks at work, there were not that many people who got a divorce...It seems since I have been online, and talking to other folks locally, that those who get divorces, for whatever reason, seem to get multiple divorces....

question :

I realize every state is different...and should probably ask my lawyer these kinds of questions ( he charges $ 225 per hour ... OUCH !! ), but just curious ( from the combined experience on here ) what percentage of divorces are settled by both parties using the same lawyer and settling that way ( probably giving the female most of what she wants...just guessing )..or having 2 lawyers involved, trading offers, and settling that way, or using mediation ( saw this on the internet ), or actually going to trial and having a judge decide...( probably the least desirable of any of the options )

Since our kids are grown, we have filed chapter 7, have lost our house, and are still fairly civil with each other, this doesn't seem like it will be difficult, but since 2 lawyers are involved....well you know $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$...

any ideas, pitfalls, things to look out for..would be appreciated..you can PM me if you like...I am not going to get into any of the details on here....just general stuff....

I had a good day with my younger son yesterday...it helped me a lot....he helped me with the computer setup and I was able to help him with some of his problems..

I used to be a computer whiz myself ....( at least I thought I was ...tee hee...)...don't know what I would do without my son.....

May God Bless,

Larry

[reeb]

Larry,

Whatever becomes of your case,,,,,,,,

YOU WILL STILL BE HERE WITH US !!!!!!!!!!!!!

I hope that wasnt morbid.


Wait until tomorrow, cause, it always brings forth another day.

Good Luck...

enough........... ( still SALUTE you no matter what )

[MORTARDUDE]

Kid :

Thanks for all the great advice !!! It was very much appreciated.

Reeb :

You are classic patriotfiles. I appreciate you a great deal !!

Take care,

Larry

Just as the LT says "Keep Movin'".....