Don?t look up from Hell now Saddam, but some of your ?ELITE? Republican Guard Units are missing!! (More To Follow!!)
Several ?Elite Republican Guard? units have come up among the missing lately! It seems that the indefeasible failed to live up to their mystique of invincibility! As the Iraqi defense of Baghdad has already begun to quake and quiver, the irresistible Coalition Forces continue to advance! ?They Come Not To Conquer, But Rather To Liberate!!?
?Hell, no one even seems to know who (if anybody) is giving orders, as Saddam and Company may be ?Moldering as Baghdad is Smoldering!?
It was recently reported that Hussein, or his generals (six of whom are already unwilling guests of the Coalition), gave orders to burst dams in order to flood the route of advance to Baghdad! The Generals, however, decided that they would much prefer a cell and three squares (MREs) a day, to a noose for War Crimes! ?Ah, yes indeed, discretion is the better part of valor!!?
Meanwhile - ?Back At The Camel Ranch (Baghdad)?, the ?Ancestors of Aladdin? are in dire need of several thousand flying carpets! But alas - ?If It Flies, It Dies?, and even the genie of yore is fresh out of miracles! And should, again, some misguided Iraqi fool opt to unleash a barrage of chemicals, Uncle Sam just may call off all bets and rain down the fires of Hades upon the ?Buffoons Of The Dunes!??
If, and this is the Coalition?s goal, Iraq is to ?Live Long and Prosper?, it had better shed itself of those who delight in the suffering of others!
?Come home soon Jessica, our nation is proud of you and your comrades!?
VERITAS
