Morning Humor!

[SuperScout]

The buzzword in today's business world is MARKETING. However, people often ask for a simple explanation of "Marketing."

Well, here it is: SUPPOSE:
You're a woman and you see a handsome guy at a party.
You go up to him and say, "I'm fantastic in bed."
That's Direct Marketing.

You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a handsome guy. One of your friends goes up to him and pointing at you says, "She's fantastic in bed."
That's Advertising.

You see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and get his telephone number. The next day you call and say, "Hi, I'm fantastic in bed."
That?s Telemarketing.

You see a guy at a party, you straighten your dress. You walk up to him and pour him a drink. You say, "May I," and reach up to straighten his tie, brushing your breast lightly against his arm, and then say, "By the way, I'm fantastic in bed."
That's Public Relations.

You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He walks up to you and says, I hear you're fantastic in bed."
That's Brand Recognition.

You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He fancies you, but you talk him into going home with your friend.
That's a Sales Rep.

Your friend can't satisfy him so he calls you.
That's Tech Support.

You're on your way to a party when you realize that there could be handsome men in all these houses you're passing. So you climb onto the roof of one situated towards the center and shout at the top of your lungs, "I'm fantastic in bed!"
That's Junk Mail.

You are at a party, this well-built man walks up to you and gropes your breast and grabs your butt.
That's Arnold Schwarzenegger!

You liked it, but 20 years later your attorney decides you were offended.
That?s America.

[DMZ-LT]

Thanks Brice , I needed that . Been in a bad mood all morning. Scouts Out !

[reconeil]

"That's America",...FOR SURE, FOR SURE or: "Fir-sheur, Fir-sheur" in Valley Girl speak.

Neil

[SuperScout]

Former President Clinton won a Grammy last night; he won the award in the children's category for his readings of the classic "Peter and The Wolf." I believe he played the wolf. .... Embarrassing moment last week for Wesley Clark -- his motorcade was pulled over by Oklahoma state troopers for speeding. Apparently he was charged with going nowhere fast. .... Democrats say they are looking for someone to balance a John Kerry ticket. I guess they need someone who's short, bald, and married to a poor woman. .... Massachusetts is about to become the first state to allow gays and lesbians to marry. Now here's the part I don't understand -- why would a gay guy want to marry a lesbian? .... It was this week, last night, in 1789, electors unanimously chose George Washington to be the first president of the United States. Well, it was a lot easier back then because there was no Florida. [Compliments of Jay Leno!]

[colmurph]

I understand that the Democratic Ticket is going to be Kerry/Fonda.