Liberals, Conservatives, and SOUTHERNERS.

[Packo]

Pose the following question:

You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and 2 small children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges. You are carrying a Colt .45 model 1911, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.

WHAT DO YOU DO?

LIBERAL ANSWER: Well, that's not enough information to answer the question! Does the man look poor or oppressed? Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack? Could we run away? What does my wife think? What about the kids? Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand? What does the law say about this situation? Does the .45 have an appropriate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what knind of message does this send to society and to my children? Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me? Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me? If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me? Should I call 9-1-1? Why is this street so deserted? We need to raise taxes, hava a paint and weed day and make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior. This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus.


CONSERVATIEVE ANSWER: BANG!



SOUTHERNER'S ANSWER:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!

CLICK....(sounds of reloading)

Wife: "Hun, he looks like he's still movin', whadda y'all kids think?"

Son: "Mama's right Daddy, I saw it too."

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!

Daughter: "Nice group Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips?"


And country folks can survive!

Packo

[Arrow]

The preacher man says its the end of time
and the Mississippi River she's a going dry.
The interest is up and the stock markets down
and you only get mugged if you go downtown.
I live back in the woods you see,
my woman, and the kids and the dogs and me.
I got a shotgun and a rifle and a four wheel drive
and a country boy can survive. Country folks can survive.

I can plow a field all day long,
I can catch catfish from dusk till dawn.
Make our own whiskey and our own smoke too
ain't to many things these boys can't do.
We grow good old tomatoes and homemade wine
and country boy can survive, country folk can survive.

Because you can't stomp us out and you can't make us run,
cause we're them ole boys raised on shotguns.
We say grace and we say mam
and if you ain't into that we don't give a damn.
We came from the West Virginia coal mine's
and the Rocky Mountains and the Western skies
and we can skin a buck, we can run a trout line
and a country boy can survive, country folks can survive.

I had a good friend in New York City
he never called me by my name just hillbilly.
My Grandpa taught me how to live off the land
and his taught him to be a business man
He used to send me pictures of the Broadway Nights
and I would send him some homemade wine
but he was killed by a man with a switchblade knife,
for forty three dollars my friend lost his life.
I'd love to spit some beechnut in that dudes eyes
and shoot him with my ole forty-five
cause a country boy can survive, country folks can survive.

'Cause you can't stomp us out and you can't make us run,
and we're them ole boys raised on shotgun.
We say grace, we say mam,
if you ain't into that we don't give a damn.
We're from North California and South Alabam'
and little towns all around this land.
We can skin a buck, and run a trout line
and a country boy can survive,
country folks can survive,
country boy can survive,
country folks can survive.

Thanks for the laugh Packy

[reconeil]

You make "SOUTHERNERS" seem like my kind of people.

Still, and if truly an: "Expert", I believe that The Conservative one: "Bang" would've sufficed,...and still kept the entire family as a bunch of: "Happy Campers".

Also, doesn't conserving ammo actually make one a Conservative?
Just a thought

Neil

[Andy]

Up here in the land of defendant's rights the shooter must be able to prove that he could not run away. Only then is it a good shoot. Even then the shooter can probably expect a law suit. They may not get much but having a legal lean on your house for 3 to 5 years is a bitch. I like the S.C. M.O. much better.

Stay healthy,
Andy

[BLUEHAWK]

The reason this is humorous is cuz it's true

[Seascamp]

a few years back a fellow blew away a perp that was trying to break into a second story window. It was one of our split level homes where the garage roof only goes one level up and this was used for the perp to gain access the an upper story window; the bedroom of a an eight year old girl. Anyway, an S&W .44mag sent the perp flying off the garage roof and DOA when he hit the driveway. The perp in question was a known/convicted child molester that was on parole from California and was somehow slipped away and was cruising over here. One would think that was an open and shut case of self-protection/family protection. Nope, not to be and criminal charges were filed.
Long and short of that deal was there was such a public outrage that the charges seemed to melt like a snowball in the center of the sun, poof. The ensuing civil suit by the perp?s family members met a similar but less rapid fate.

Seems as how having elected Judges, the Sheriff and DA may have worked toward justice far more than the legal system ever could. But I?m not saying there was any connect between the intense hue and cry that went up and the sudden discovery of common sense and reality; no, I?m not saying that at all.

Scamp

[BLUEHAWK]

Well Scamp, in Law School folks are actually taught that codified laws DO come from the common sense mores of the people... sooner or later, eh?

[Seascamp]

Well maybe some Law Schools Blue, some. But the closer ya get to the east or west coast the more ya find that legal common sense is either extinct, a threatened species or a punishable offence and a cause for disbarment proceedings.

Scamp

[SuperScout]

Let's see:

1. Snow up to personal body parts for much of the year.
2. Senators Kerry and Kennedy.
3. State and local taxes that are sky-high.
4. Gun laws that favor the perps.
5. The sole possessor of common sense in a 4-state radius.

.... and you still want to live there?

[Andy]

When I was seven and got struck out in little league baseball, I wanted to quit. Dad took me aside and in his wonderful fatherly way, sort of like Ward Clever, he told me, ?Don?t give the bastard the satisfaction.? I took that to heart.

Besides sometimes I write letters to the editor. The last letter was about fighting bad guys on our turf (World Trade Center) or fighting on their turf (Baghdad). Late at night after most people had said their prayers, (?Oh Nonexistent Divine Being please make everyone just like our wonderful Senators?.), and gone to sleep, then I get phone calls. People whisper, ?I liked what you wrote?, (said in a disguised voice) and then quickly hang up.

I used to love to play football. I could curse people, hit them really hard and not get arrested. Later, 27 months in Vietnam, 28 years as a cop, now this cancer thing. I don?t know Scout, maybe I actually like to fight? Is that a bad thing?

Stay healthy,
Andy
PS: The snow never got more than mid-thigh this year.